Target Is My Self Care

Friendship … is born at the moment when one man says to another “What! You too? I thought that no one but myself . . .
CS Lewis

Until this point, I credit two things with my suburban survival: self care and Target.  Two weeks ago, the two collided beautifully as I got my hair done and bantered with my new stylist.  After opening up to each other about breastfeeding struggles, how we trick our toddlers into eating, and the loss of identity when you’re “just a mom” for the first time, she bashfully posed a question to me.

“Do you ever, like, just go to Target. At night. After the kids are asleep.  And just sort of walk around?”

“Oh man, I thought I was the only one!” I said, mentally noting that this woman was a strong candidate for BFF status.

I didn’t give this exchange much thought until last Thursday when I […]

By |January 21st, 2016|Girl Gab, MOMents, Musings|0 Comments

The New Normal

We did it.  We packed our life into nondescript Uhaul boxes, shed all the things we no longer need, and we moved.

Our life looked very neat in carefully labeled, uniform brown boxes.  And then came the chaotic work of unpacking. This adventure has been so much more than moving. It was not a case of simply picking up a life, planting it somewhere new, and letting it continue growing. How we do life has changed entirely. Six weeks in, we’re still finding our new normal.

People have asked how we’ve settled. And I suppose we’ve settled alright – in the way that things in your junk drawer settle after you slam it shut, jumbling all the pieces. Settled.  But not organized and neat and orderly. A few stubborn boxes have refused to unpack themselves.  Mackenzie has only recently fallen into any semblance of routine. And I still wander the aisles at most stores trying to find my […]

By |January 11th, 2016|Family, Life, Little Ass-Kicker, Musings|0 Comments

Workplace Bullying


On Tuesday, Andrew complained that he had to spend over an hour in a mandatory Worksafe BC seminar about workplace bullying.  Apparently, every workplace in BC has to put a workplace bullying plan in to effect. Ya know, so that when the kids all gang up on you at lunch, there’s someone to tattle to.  This involves spending billable hours (on the company’s dime!) in the aforementioned seminar.

Andrew works as a software developer. Most of the people he works with are software developers.  Do you really  think that it’s necessary to herd all the software developers into a room to tell them not to bully each other?

Apparently, Big City Church, where I work, is also mandated to hold one of these seminars at some point. Because there is such a systematic problem with Pastors bullying each other?

More importantly, since when is it necessary to herd grown adults into a room to […]

Back to Work

Once I parked my car in a gravel lot, just as it started to rain. Once it had rained for a while, a critical eye might have noticed the lot was a bit a lot more mud than gravel. I didn’t notice until I got in my car and tried to back out. I had a horrifying moment, when I realized I had been stuck.  My tires spun for a moment, then I got traction and was hurled back into motion. Funny how it wasn’t until that violent jolt, finally gaining traction and momentum, that I fully understood that I had been stuck.

Going back to work has made me realize that I was a bit stuck. Depressed? Blue? A slight bout of postpartum? Who knows. In any case, going back to work has been like that violent, pivotal moment that my tires got traction and I started moving again. Oh my gosh, I was […]

By |July 5th, 2014|Family, Gender Issues, Little Ass-Kicker, MOMents, Musings|1 Comment

Thought of the day | April 22, 2014

“You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories. If people wanted you to write warmly about them, they should have behaved better.”
― Anne Lamott, Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life

By |April 22nd, 2014|Adventures with Crazies, Musings, People that Inspire Me|0 Comments

Can we just stop the bare-faced selfies?

I want to talk about the c-word: cancer. It’s a word we like to throw around without thinking about the gravity. Especially if it has been a while since someone we know has had cancer. And really, the likelihood is that it only has been a little while since someone we know has had cancer. Probably someone we know well and love dearly.

Still, we throw that little word around so flippantly. Facebook is full of “cancer awareness” gimmicks, in which women post details from the benign to risqué, to, you know, raise cancer awareness.

“Blue, heehee.”

“Leopard print!”


What is blue, leopard print, or see-through? Bras. Because posting your bra color will raise awareness about cancer.

“I like it on the floor!”

“I like it on the kitchen counter!”

“I like it on my desk at work!”

What was the mysterious “it”? Purses. Not. Freaking. Kidding.

Apparently all this cryptic nonsense is saving lives and curing disease and […]

By |March 19th, 2014|Musings|7 Comments

Cry, Baby, Cry

Back in the good old days – 2007 or so – my friend Ryan came to visit from Seattle.  We had only been in BC for a few months, and getting out and about with a familiar face felt like a reprieve from the isolation and loneliness I had been feeling.  We sat in The Winchester  The Dublin Crossing drinking Black and Tans, listening to a cover band play the Beattles…
Cry, baby, cry. Make your mother sigh.  She’s old enough to know better. So cry, baby, cry.
It was the first time I had ever heard that particular Beattles song.  It was poignant to experience a Beattles song for the first time as an adult, since most of us are flippantly introduced to I Want To Hold Your Hand et al as children. For some reason, the song really got under my skin. It […]

By |March 18th, 2014|Little Ass-Kicker, MOMents, Musings|1 Comment

A Season of Gifting?

I have very fond memories of growing up on the west coast of Scotland. Faint, and probably very idealized, but amongst the haze of a childhood exploring highlands and castles and playing in farmers’ fields, I have a few crystal clear memories.  My mum and I walked everywhere. Unless it was raining; and then we might have taken the bus.  On one particularly drizzly day, we had been at the Well Park in Greenock for a walk.  The park has iconic gates, the only feature of the park I really remember. As a child, the huge stone frame of the gates and the tall, iron grates seemed so imposing, and a little ominous on a grey and gloomy day.

As we left the park, a little drunk man stumbled towards us. He slurred his speech and seemed to struggle staying upright.  His stooped stature made him seem so much smaller than my mum, […]

By |December 18th, 2013|Musings, People that Inspire Me|4 Comments

It’s Red Cup Season, Again!

The anual release of Starbucks’ red cups is milestone I look for each year.  I celebrate Red Cup Day pretty religiously. At the very least, ritualistically. I buy a ginormous latte and take the time to really think about the time that has passed since the previous year.  I’ve written about this before, but I think it’s important that we urbanites find cyclical markers to remind us of how fleeting each season in our lives can be.

We are no longer people of the land. We’re not engaged with nature the way we once were. Some of us leave the house to commute to work at 7 am, and may not get home again until 6:30. We miss the changing winds, the first real chill in the air, the first falling of the leaves. And then we wake up one morning and the trees are almost barren, frost has formed on […]

By |November 5th, 2013|Musings, Things That I Love|3 Comments

The End of an Era

This will be the last blog post I write on Maxwell, my 5-year-old MacBook.  It’s the end of an era. And it’s bittersweet.  My new and shiny MacBook Air will arrive today and Maxwell will cease to be my go-to guy.

As much as I’m thrilled to move on from Maxwell, I’m sort of grieving. Just a little.  Sure, Maxwell burns me if he sits on my lap for too long.  Sure, 20% of the screen is blocked-out with fuzzy gray lines.  Sure, he can’t quite handle a lot of the heavier media software I like to use.  But it’s hard to say goodbye.

Somewhere along the way, I think I started to think of Maxwell as a person, of sorts.  Partly, because we’ve spent so much time together and been through so much.  We’ve done some really cool creative projects together. And we’ve fought through a lot of his quirks […]

By |September 25th, 2013|Musings, Things That I Love|1 Comment